What should I do (and not do) when first thinking about divorce?

Get advice (including legal and therapeutic) before you take any significant step. Gather information on your divorce options, and your family finances. Take time to assemble this information, review it thoughtfully, and make good decisions. Most importantly:

   •    Choose a respectful method of making decisions.

   •    Don’t expose your child to hostility between you and your spouse.

   •    Don’t reach an agreement with your spouse until you get legal advice.

   •    Don’t make threats (except that you will see a lawyer).

   •    Don’t let any argument deteriorate into violence (not even throwing a plastic cup).

   •    Don’t move out without getting legal advice.

   •    Don’t cancel insurance policies or change beneficiaries.

   •    Don’t attempt to hide assets.

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